I am truly disturbed…

With Metal Gear Solid 4 being just a few days away, Konami wants to remind you of some of the most awkward times in MGS history. Enjoy the embarrassment.

The above video (and the two following the jump) make it seem so easy to accomplish anything with the Dragon Ball Z KAMEHAMEHA! attack, from stapling, stamping, and talking on the phone in an office, to seducing women, to kicking people straight in the nuts. The videos made it seems like shouting (or whispering) “KAMEHAMEHA!” was the perfect addition to any task, so I decided to try the technique on my keyboard for writing this post. Unfortunately, this was all I managed to get:

slfd jlykbar0 k]ll fs; kvl,gabpwmt=, ekaslk[pav md,gjpp98576pvn f

Maybe I didn’t say it right or something.
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Thomas Ballard of Delhi, LA was celebrating his leet gaming skills one minute, then being served a search warrant the next. It seems that Ballard tried to call a friend after a gaming session, touting he had “killed them all”. The problem was that instead of reaching his friend, Thomas dialed a wrong number. The person who he reached took the statements in a different context, and proceeded to call the authorities. It didn’t take the cops long to show up to his residence, where they searched for possible bodies and then arrested Ballard for a previous unrelated warrant.

Now, the details are still sparse on this case, but lets make one thing clear. Gamers, if you are going to call someone to talk about video games, make sure they know what you’re talking about. Some people may be too concerned about the fact that you got a “triple kill” to properly congratulate you.

[Via The News Star]

So, imagine if you were given the opportunity to have 11 million dollars. Just try to imagine it. Personally, I can’t even imagine what I’d do with just one million dollars. Well, apparently neither can Dr. Ryuta Kawashima, reports Miwa Suzuki over at Yahoo! News. Here’s the deal: Kawashima was one of the big researchers behind Brain Age which, in case you’ve been living under a rock for the last year and a half, has done astoundingly well. Heck, even this reporter has a habit of hunkering down for some Brain Age when it comes to finals time–I’m convinced it helps me study (though there’s probably a factor of procrastination in there, too). Anyway, with this kind of success also comes big honkin’ royalty checks, which Kawashima apparently just forwards along to his university, preferring to live off of his “meager” $100,000 salary instead.

Of course, this guy isn’t all sunshine and daisies. Apparently this guy’s family is kind of irritated at him for not sharing the wealth, but he just told them that, “if they want money, go out and earn it.” As if this didn’t seem loving enough, he also destroyed a game disk when his kids broke the rules. Shouldn’t that be considered some sort of sin?

Regardless, this is one truly selfless individual. Now if one of MY professors would just develop a hit game and start donating to the university, maybe they could fix the radiator in my English classroom…

It’s not hard to see that I love playing shit games. A ton of my reviews on MEGATONik have all been extremely bland titles. Hell, even the boxart on most of the titles are enough to tell you to stay away. Why do I review these games? The answer is plain and simple: I love bad games. It’s as appealing to me as the grindhouse film genre. I enjoy laughing at terrible plots, generic names, and pointless tasks. Superman 64 may have been utter shit to you, but in my eyes, it was a pile of gold.

Some of you may think I just have poor taste in games, while some may also share my love. I know several readers out there have seen games at their local GameStop and dismissed them because of their title or boxart. People like me purchase them. I see something that looks like total ass and I buy it. I find more comedy in these budget games than most huge titles.

I know there are people out there who would like to know about the games that sites like IGN and GameSpot don’t review. Licensed Nickelodeon games, odd Japanese games that have been translated into English and forgotten about, Barbie titles; whatever crap you can think of, I’ll write about it.

This is why I’m presenting a new weekly article written by yours truly. The Garbage Collector will be a weekly article about bad, uninteresting, and/or extremely cheap titles that you’ve probably seen or heard about, but ignored. Brace yourself as I dig into the massive shitpile I call my game collection and pull out bargain bin nightmares.

Read on for the first game for me to babble about, Mobile Light Force 2.

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While I usually try to avoid the bizarre antics of PETA, a friend of mine turned my attention today to PETA’s Super Chick Sisters, a flash game just oozing with edutainment and Mario-like goodness.

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The guys over at Popular Mechanics have encountered a few problems with the PS3 version of Assassin’s Creed, Ubisoft’s triple-A title for this years holiday season. Five minutes into the first game, Altair, the game’s main character, froze in midair while jumping off of a building. The camera panned as usual, but everything else was frozen. The only way to reboot the game was to do a hard restart of the console. Apparently, the glitch repeated several times (video).

Hit the jump for some more info.

[Thanks for the tip, Wayne]
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GameTrailers has the exclusive first footage of developer Gamecock’s offbeat dodgeball game, Pirates vs. Ninjas. The age old question, “Who is better: Pirates or Ninjas?” aims to be answered within the game … this time in the form of dodgeball. They could have picked a more appropriate medium (oh, let’s say fight to the death?), but instead chose the valiant form of throwing an oversized red rubber ball at one another to see which group is better.

The gameplay, shown above in short snippets, is not the most impressive we have seen in an Xbox Live Arcade or Playstation Network game, but does look intriguing what with all of the powerups and such shown in the video.

And for the record, I’m calling it now — ninjas win.

While browsing the Rock Band forums, I came across an interesting thread. Apparently, this guy was jamming too loud on the day of the game’s release, and ended up getting evicted for it. It wasn’t his first offense, but it’s still interesting that their need to rock got them kicked out. He has until December 1st to leave, so most of the replies are telling him to crank it up to 11 until then. I’ve embedded the eviction notice from November 21 after the jump.
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Ever finished a game, watched the ending cut scene, turned off the console and just sat there going “…what the hell just happened?” Games Radar has posted a pretty cool article on their site that you can relate to if you answered “yes,” to the previous question. They made a top 7 list of the weirdest video game endings ever. The list includes alien ass, a pig, boobs, a snake, and is filled with tremendous letdowns and confusion. The list also includes videos on every ending. Overall, it’s a damned good list, and a fun read. Of course, the most obvious warning before reading this article: SPOILERS.

The writers of NBC’s Emmy-winning show, My Name Is Earl, obviously love the Guitar Hero franchise. It got mention in last season’s episode where Earl got his G.E.D., and it makes an appearance again in the third season.

This clip shows Earl’s prison warden not only playing the unreleased Guitar Hero III, but using the new Gibson Les Paul controller. Obviously, the guy in the video has a special talent of playing on Expert without looking at the screen.

Now if I could just beat GH2 on Hard….

Heavy metal and ultra-violence? Count me in! This new teaser trailer for Double Fine Productions’ Brutal Legend appeared yesterday, and … it looks interesting. For some reason, it reminds of The Mark of Kri. I’m not entirely sure why, though. Anyway, I’m definitely looking forward to Brutal Legend, and rest assured that I’ll follow it closely until its release.